Style

A PAUSE.

May 21, 2020


Today marks my two months of staying at home. I scrolled up my calendar and saw that the last time I went out was the 22nd of March, my dog’s birthday party. This lockdown made me realized that I hadn’t had a long break for the past eight years of my career. Even when I’m traveling, I still produce content. My career has played a big part in my life, and it felt weird to pause on that. My days used to be filled with back to back meetings, events, shooting, meeting new people, and socializing. I was always on the go. This is the first time I learned to slow down, unwind, and decompress in the past eight years. Having a lot of time at home makes me think a lot, and I’d like to share my two cents today.

• I am not in control
The current situation reminds me that the future is uncertain. But that doesn’t mean that is a source of panic. Yes, we cannot control what is going to happen in our lives, but we can control our mindset. I am being reminded that God is in control, and I’m being humbled once again that I have to surrender and not use my own power.

• Lots of self-reflection
I’m using this time to re-visit my values. What do I find valuable in life? Our values cement our understanding of who we are and what we want. They lead us to the people and opportunities that fill our lives with meaning.

I also get to know myself better during this situation. I learned how to process my feelings better. I know what triggers me, why I’m feeling what I’m feeling, what makes me unhappy, and, most importantly, exploring my deep-rooted insecurities. It felt uncomfortable at first, but the only way I can grow is to identify and make peace with it.

This pandemic is also the perfect time to detect the areas that I need to grow in. I realized that I need to grow in my serving heart. Now that I have more free time, I use this to serve my husband more. I learn to cook, gave him a pedicure, made his favorite jelly, and learn to understand his needs better. All the small thing counts, and there’s no reason to be “too busy.”

• Make meaningful relationships
Thankful for technology that brings us closer to each other. I use this time to discuss deep conversations with the people I care about most. This is the time to be vulnerable with one another. This is the time to bring each other up. I want to be someone who can help other people. Your friends might not show it, but trust me, deep down, every one of us is going through something, whether it’s their insecurities, stress at work, uncertainties, family issues, or toxic relationships. Whatever that is, I want to help them identify and process their feelings.

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